a few of my wants
I’ve started this blog post several different times many years ago. Each time taking a new angle…adjusting some here and there. Inevitably highlighting it all and hitting delete. I am not a writer and I dislike Language Arts. I just love to journal my life for my kiddos and hopefully to inspire others to serve and love. I don’t feel like my words can give light to what I feel being pressed so firmly on my heart…and yet I desire to. I so want to type out each thought and feeling which overwhelms my heart and mind and for them to be understood and heard, but sometimes the words just won’t come. And that’s okay.
I want joy. I want joy in every single part of our lives. I walked the other morning and just griped for a good 50 minutes to God about the things which bother my heart to the core…it was my confession…my accountability…my way of saying I really want Jesus, but wow do I struggle with these feelings sometimes. I want to choose Jesus which means I am choosing joy, love, kindness, grace, mercy, compassion and respect. I want to choose Jesus all the time.
I want to give. I want to give generously. I want a person to cross my mind and act. I want to see a need and do something about it. I want our giving to be lavish and with a cheerful heart only giving God every bit of the glory. He should be our reason. I want Him to own our bank account…His money, not ours. Pay check to pay check for His glory…for His kingdom…for His people…to make Him known that He is love and life. Whatever it may be, whatever may come, we want to condition our hearts by giving so God will continue to stretch and mold us and shape us into greater and greater givers.
I want to see people as Jesus sees them. No labels. No pre conceived notions. No unfair opinions. I want to look in the faces of the people who surround me, who fill our neighborhood and church and life and give respect and love. I want to reach into their lives and remind them of how absolutely beautiful they are. How precious and amazingly created in God’s image they are. They are valued. We are valued. Set apart by Christ. Children of the Most High. God, the Creator of the Universe, allowed His only Son to die for them…for you…for me. God absolutely adores and cherishes us. I want to remind people every day of this crazy good truth.